Denver, a city ahead of the curve
PRESSING QUESTION: “Why the delay, asshole,” you clamor? My answer is, I don’t have the first damn clue. After casting my vote this past Election Day (11.2), I plumb forgot to mention this quirky little pearl…until now. So deal with the 28-day delay or go fingerblast yourself.
On November 2nd, 2010, Colorado’s forward-thinking citizens and I were asked to make a brave decision—should we or shouldn’t we approve the formation of an extraterrestrial, space alien welcoming committee?
They call it Ballot Initiative 300. Here’s the campaign website (the title bar is simply “Home.” Irony or idiocy? you decide), and here’s the initiative’s exact wording:
Shall the voters for the City and County of Denver adopt an Initiated Ordinance to require the creation of an extraterrestrial affairs commission to help ensure the health, safety, and cultural awareness of Denver residents and visitors in relation to potential encounters or interactions with extraterrestrial intelligent beings or their vehicles, and fund such commission from grants, gifts and donations?
Perhaps it’s a phlegmball to the face of Arizona Gov. Jan Himmler Brewer and her patently xenophobic train wreck, S.B.1070. If so, godspeed you little initiative. But I’ve got a hunch Initiative 300 ain’t about Denver proving how unequivocally xenophilic it can be.
And to all you thrifty, Wal-Martyring Tea Partiers, fret not. Ballot Initiative 300 would be funded by donations, not tax dollars. So let’s not get our Shroud of Turin panties in a wad about it, dig?
But no matter. On Election Day, for better or worse, Ballot Initiative 300 was roundly rejected by Denver voters, suffering a crippling 17-83 defeat. Although I have it on good authority that American voters’ overall judgment and decision-making was markedly askew on that day.
I just think it’s awesome that I live in a state that puts such EPCOT-esque measures on its national election ballot.