The best thing to happen since corn syrup
Not sure if you caught the SEC Championship this past weekend—in which my beloved University of Georgia Bulldogs (second only to my first love, the Michigan Wolverines) self-destructed against the LSU Tigers—but if not, know that the most dramatic scene of the whole football match happened at halftime.
As part of the Dr. Pepper $1,000,000 Tuition Challenge, which basically is a philanthropic smokescreen to divert attention from its starring role in America’s obesity epidemic, Dr. Pepper staged the Tuition Throw during halftime. The winner was awarded $100,000 towards his or her tuition.
Backstory complete, let’s get to the good stuff—the video below. Thank you, Ivon Padilla-Rodriguez, for making such a triumphantly pathetic remark.
“Dr. Pepper is seriously the best thing that has ever happened to me.” Are you fucking kidding me? It’s safe to say those words have never ever been strung together before in human history—and for good reason. She should turn into a pillar of salt substitute just for thinking that.
If this quote doesn’t become a meme or get parodied somehow, then we’re all just idiots. Myself included.